I’m not sure what made a certain canoe so special, but it does seem clear that two Karens resorted to combat to win over rights to paddle the murky waters the two scuffled in—literally.

Somebody off-camera and in the background keeps calling one of the two combatants clad in a black swim suit by the name of “Lindsey”(otherwise known as Karen). Let’s just go with Karen, given the unladylike behavior. Poor fish had zero chance for a peaceful swim during this water-borne fracas.

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If you’ve never actually seen two crocodiles battle it out, you can now say you sorta came close. Watch the brief human/amphibian hybrid match below (warning—graphic imagery and foul language ahead…as you may have guessed):

With sad and distasteful antics like this, who can blame catfish for staying deep in cavernous mudholes?